growth

Yoga

So, the next 4 months are going to be seriously committed to yoga. More than likely, if I do write anything, semi-publically, it’ll probably be about that. So fore-warning. I’m predicting most of it will be under a cut to save you guys, some is going to be under the inner sanctum locks and some probably won’t be written here at all.

I’m also going to be taking long breaks from technology, with the exception of communicating with my immediate family and reading from time to time. So if I miss something, please email or text it to me. I do want to keep up with you all, but this is going to be some intense inner work. I’m really hoping to get over the last remaining issues of my 20s and early 30s, since I want to go into my mid-late 30s and 40s without all that residual anger.

If you all are interested in a yoga filter, let me know and I’ll create one. That way those who want to read my spoutings can, and those who don’t can miss it. This goes for Fb’ers as well, because I can cross post to filters, there.

My creative half

Over the course of the last couple of weeks, I’ve discovered something interesting about myself…when my creative side is safe and secure, I tend to watch movies involving romance. I noticed about a year ago, that I stopped watching most of my movie collection and pretty much stopped watching movies all-together. Never really questioned it and chalked it up to lack of interest and need to focus elsewhere. A couple of weeks ago, I shed some baggage and dropped a layer of armour. I’ve basically shut down the desire to write, because I was tired of things being read into my writing and basic fear of what it might mean to others. Well, dropped that off a high pier, I’m tired of worrying about that because I don’t want others to feel they can’t do something because of my feelings, therefore, I should not let that dictate my own writings. I feel lighter, more in love with life and the things that I do. I am ready to start exploring the new depths that I have waded into and find the new treasures.

I’ve also started watching my sappy movies. It’s my guilty movie pleasure, but it stokes the fires that let me see the beauty in everything and not so much the negativity.

Good riddance to bad rubbish. And may the love letters flow from my pen.

Horrorscope

Scorpio (October 23-November 21)

The roots of big old trees are your power objects. I advise you to visualize them in your mind’s eye for a few minutes each day, maybe even go look at actual trees whose roots are showing above ground. Doing this will strengthen your resolve and increase your patience and help you find the deeper sources of nurturing you need. Another exercise that’s likely to energize you in just the right way is to picture yourself at age 77. I suggest you create a detailed vision of who you’ll be at that time. See yourself drinking a cup of tea as you gaze out over a verdant valley on a sunny afternoon in June. What are you wearing? What kind of tea is it? What birds do you see? What are your favorite memories of the last 30 years?

FreeWill Astrology

Given the way the last couple of weeks have been going, and my mum’s diagnosis of me having the flu, would probably be a good idea to nurture myself. I think it would be a good idea to go back and look at my roots. Any time there is a change of chapters, returning to roots is a good means to integrate the new things learned with the old things, in order to move forward. So, I’ll work on this, this week. 🙂

That said, things are going nicely. I found some decking, in the event that I have to suffer the horrid colour of paint on my patio, that matches the condo siding. My pepper plants are looking nice, growing slowly, but good. I’ll be able to afford new planters soon, so they’ll be ready. 🙂 The strawberry plant is doing wonderfully, too. The roses….not so much. The praying mantii were late in hatching, and the white flies have already destroyed a good bit of them. They’ll be getting cut back a good bit come winter, hoping to rid the world of some white flies. In the process of figuring out which new herbs to buy for the new planter box, preferably some Italian ones, given my love of Italian food.

Office is coming together, slowly. LivingSocial is all resolved, and I’m definitely getting interest from folks who want to be members. In the process of hoping to interview at least one therapist, soon. My yoga certification starts in September, super psyched about that, given my need to get active again. In the meantime, I’m looking around for affordable rollerblades in hope that I can start waking up early enough to go for a skate without overheating. One step at a time, and I am getting there. Balance is delicate, but it’s working, as long as I keep the bigger picture in mind and keep my reacting in the moment to the moments. I’m highly worried that I’m over-stressing myself to a heart attack. Just need to get through this point and I’m good.

Been one heck of a week. Tuesday-Thursday has been non-stop appointment making, which is good but drives me nuts, given how much I hate phone conversations. So far, we have 4 people interested in some kind of membership, one of them I will be seeing again next week. Need to print out some more price menus, as my window one has been given away and my spare has also. Been some hit and miss, which I can deal with. I do need to hit up the school and put up an advert for a female therapist, as I need one by October, anyway, so this is a good time to at least run the possibility of building her client list.

The house is coming along, haven’t really done anything lately, but the doors have been picked out, outlets changed and fixed one to work. Picked out the window film, too for both the sunroom crappy window and the bathroom/bedroom door windows.

eydimork, if you read this, I remember you posting a recipe or something for portobello mushroom caps. I’m at the point where I would love to try and make them, and your description sounded absolutely yummy.

Pastry has received his wonderful packet from the embassy for his visa. So we’re on our way.

Lots of positive things. I’m hoping this LivingSocial coupon brings in more folks, I’d like to start being more social again. Now that I’m only going out to Acworth once a month, there’s a better chance, as that’s $15 of gas money that stays in my pocket, instead of being paid out every week (which means more trivia night at NRT!).

So, today I started my work at getting up earlier. I’ve changed all my alarms by 15 minutes and succeeded in getting out of bed 5 minutes after the last alarm went off. Goal is to be getting up by the last alarm by the end of the week. Next week, the second alarm.

An interesting note, last night Lexus curled up in my arms to sleep, right next to my head. It’s odd for her since she’s fairly anti-social (must be on her terms, not my desire to pet her if she’s sitting next to me). Not sure what’s going on, and I’m hoping it’s not a sign of something to come. This week is going to be busy as I get into the later part of the week, but that is a-ok by me.

Work is decent, my weekly headache has returned with a vengeance and is managing to avoid coming in. Not sure if it’s intentional, or just circumstance, but discussion will be had, somehow! Google voice is being a bitch and not letting me call anyone from my phone, which is annoying as I don’t wish to give my cell number out to clients.

I am now past page 300 in Inifinite Jest and finally hit the point where I can’t put it down. It was a slow starter, but once the ball gained some momentum, it really started rolling down hill.

I snagged a pack of outlet receptacles for the apartment, so I can start replacing those tomorrow and maybe get my room into some level of habitat. Need to call the BritJew so he can come take a look at my ideas for the door. Also need to call the community handyman and set up some time for him to quote me for the vanity mirror install.

I am focusing on being optimistic about this year. Things will be good.

Oh yeah, the gov’t sent me a receipt, the Pastry has been approved to petition for Visa status, so first hurdle passed, now on to the fun stuff!!

The parental visit was great. It’s kinda funny, given the past, as to how we are becoming more a family and having more fun together. The amusing part, was how the Pastry managed to pull my dad away from the women’s basketball final for dinner at the table. I loved it, even though I was a little late, because my TV show download had a hiccup. We also went and did a lot of stuff. Usually our visits include Dr visits and shopping, this time was a lot of socializing and looking at stuff. I think the next one will be, too. I really hope my brother and his family can go with us, too.

As for me, Surgeon appointment has been scheduled, so one thing down. Next week I’m going to start working myself into my new schedule, so Teacher training won’t be such a shock to the system and a struggle to do everything I need to get done. Better to work into it so the kinks won’t be as detrimental. Also, doing a full “spring cleaning” next week and going to start working on the front closet, so it will be just as useful as the sunroom. Also need to stock up on the summer foods, already starting to experience the issues with eating less per meal. Pastry also noted the fact that our issues resolved in Texas, as my mum makes more vegetables with the meals than we do when we are at home. So….fresh veggies here I come….now to just make sure I’m home at decent hours to make dinner.

I have decided that it’s time for this journal to evolve….I just don’t know what it will evolve into. Reasoning is, it was started to give me space to explore myself, resolve issues and move forward. At this point, I’ve worked through almost everything that caused severe imbalances. Going forward is a different chapter and I need to move towards that.

So….let’s see….I’ve been accepted by Peachtree Yoga for the fall course of their teacher certification class. I’m excited about it, and am willing to wake up before dawn on the weekends to make it to class. I’m hoping it will allow me to turn more into an early morning person than a late morning person. I really hate not really being awake till around 10ish. It’ll also get me on more of a schedule and will also force me to move my work schedule to the one that I want (haven’t done it, because I haven’t had a need to do so). It also means I’ll be back to a Mon-Fri schedule. Yay weekends!!!! Downside, need to find another female therapist, which has always been a bane for me. I know very few female therapists who meet my expectations in both capability and work ethic. Maybe it’s just a therapist thing, namely in who is attracted to the field and their expectations on how the field works, who knows. Anyway, I’ll start working on that stuff soon.

Now, on to hunting down payments due from clients. Fun!!!

In a little over a month, I will have owned my business, as it currently stands, for 2 years and will be moving into the 3rd year. And finally, we are moving into a bigger location so I can get my ass moving on the other stuff I want to do with it. I’m actually looking forward to this year. One of my previous contracts is trying to get me back, with the new limits, there’s a better chance that it will be more lucrative than it was last year. As a result, I’m going to have to learn a new balancing act. It also means, all new clients will be directed towards the guys. My goal was to have 4 hours of work a day, for 5 days a week. Right now, I’m working 6 days a week (more often than not, it’s just 1-2 clients on my “day off”). I figure, if I have 2 clients in the morning and 2 in the afternoon/evening, I will be able to accomplish everything I need. Still waiting on the yoga school to contact me about the upcoming certification classes. Fingers crossed that I can get in on this year’s class.

On the house front, I just finished ripping up all but one patch of carpet in the bedroom. There are deep cracks everywhere!!! Going to talk to the JewBrit about filling those in, and waiting for the _gothfather_ to let me know if I need to prime and prep it. Goal there is to put heated tile in, after I get the doors installed. Bathroom is coming along, I’m going to pick up the new mirror on Tuesday – so if anyone needs/wants mirroring, you’re welcome to it, free to a good home. Still waiting on the courts to send me my court date for the HVAC issue. Once that is resolved, hopefully in my favour, I can get the sunroom windows fixed and finish that room. Also need to get an electrician out here, but I think I’ll delay that till I’m ready to finish up the bathroom renovation.

Personal front, Orthonatic appointment is set for Feb 2, parents are coming to sit in on that. Once I get the timeline, we’ll be off! Hopefully, this time next year I’ll be able to train again, which means I’ll need to figure out what I want to do there. As much as I don’t want to move teams, that seems to be my only real option, unless the in-town location has another main instructor. So, we’ll see.

I need to get back to writing, as evidenced by the lack of posting here. After spending several days wondering why, it’s mainly because my main thinking time is at work, where I don’t have internet (yet) and the fact that a few situations has stilted my desire to speak my mind (that whole, people must drum up drama from what someone says, and not take it and leave it at face value). What I write here is normally what I’m thinking or feeling at that given moment about whatever subject I’m writing. In the past, that resulted in overt interrogations about what exactly I was talking about and how that involved certain people that weren’t even part of my mental discussion. I need to get over that.

The other part, is that I’m pretty involved in business stuffs, which is my focus and not necessarily the poetry and stories of my life. I need to reverse that and find a nice balance between the two, I miss poetry. I think I need to just fill up my 8×11.5 notebook, so I can invest in a smaller one that fits in my messenger bag. Maybe I’ll leave that one at work.

I’m also spending a decent chunk working on my house stuffs. I’ve fixed 2 walls, and tonight I’ll start working on the next one. After that, the ceiling joints of said walls. Fun stuff, actually. Once all of that is done, I start on the new base molding. I’m considering ceiling molding on the basis that it will save me from having to re-seam the living/dining room joints, as those are the ones in the worst of shape. We shall see, but it will be beautiful. Keeps me busy in my free time, too.

Been working on my culinary skills, as well. Not going as well as the house stuffs, but at least it’s going. Occasionally, I get a bug to cook something “European”, least, my version of a fancy lunch/dinner. Still loving the Thai cooking, but that’s because it involves shoving everything into one bowl. Maybe I’ll just focus on lunch, since I have time to cook it, as dinner comes right after I get home.

So that’s the update.