So, I checked my voicemail from yesterday, finally. And had a call from the Redneck, explaining that he was the strange person in the car next to me on the highway, on my way home from the theater this morning. My dear, you are not the first person to try to get my attention while driving. In fact, I make a point of avoiding all contact for people who ride up next to me and hang out in my direct line of peripheral vision. My chiro has done it, my teammates have done it, and I’m sure others will try. My suggestion to you all, get in front of me, or just ahead of me and wave out the window.

I was driving home from CNN, back when I worked there and I still had the Civic. Guy in a Toyota SUV pulls up next to me, and me being me and wanting to be directly aware of my environment looked over. Only to find that not only did he have a prince albert, but he angled his rearview mirror to ensure that I knew what he was doing with it. I slowed down, sped up, for multiple reasons (namely being I didn’t want to see that – secondary because I needed to get off at my exit) to no avail. I guess he finally got his thrill (though, you couldn’t tell by the flacid appearance) and he sped off. And that is why I dislike making eye contact with the people in cars next to me. I trust my peripheral vision, since it’s off the charts, and look only when I need to check blind spots.