I had to share this one for today:
You might seek out extra private time today and the quiet solace can do you a world of good. Unexpected visitors or a change in your schedule can increase your anxiety level, so it’s important to do whatever is necessary to replenish your energy. Don’t be afraid of turning off your computer and pulling the plug on your phone. If at all possible, get out and enjoy the comfort and beauty offered by nature. (Tarot.com)
And how true it is. I’ve been spending the last week using every available time to de-stress and meditate. It seems to be helping my headspace a little, but that will be the following post. At any rate, I have a 1.5 hour opening this afternoon, that is now completely dedicated to me. The last couple of weeks have taken a toll on me, and while I really enjoy my friends, and enjoy taking care of them as I can, I can’t do it right now. It’s one reason why I’ve taken time off of IMs (and no ET, this has nothing to do with our chats. I miss them actually). I’ve had too many people coming at me left and right demanding my time, in fact, at this rate, I’m sure I pissed off a teammate for demanding he tell me what he was talking about in email instead of over the phone. I’ve come to the conclusion, that until I feel satisfied, I’m going to be selfish. I’ve gotten tired of putting everyone else ahead of me, and right now, I need to come first. I know I need to learn to guard myself so my “Can I help you?” vibes get quashed when I’m not in therapist mode, but I also need to get better about helping people help themselves so I don’t become the designated “go-to” guy for mental stability. Which brings me to stress. I’m a massage therapist, people tend to think that we are the most laid back people ever. WRONG! I have to deal with clients who don’t like me taking time for myself, because it takes out the time they wanted for a massage. I have to deal with high-strung clients who expect me to take their relaxing breath for them and rush me because they have no concept of “loose scheduling”. And that’s fine for them. I will not take that route for myself. Anyway, I’m convinced it’s manifested in my post-lunch upset stomach, as well as my hyper-alertness (though, my fighting doesn’t help that either). The result is a diet change, to figure out if it’s breakfast (though, the way today is setting up, obviously it’s not) or something else. I have plans to go see the nutritionist at the gym, as well as acupuncture and a trip to my therapist.
The positive in all of this, is that it makes me look forward to my trip to Scandinavia all that much more. At any rate, this is why I don’t answer my phone, and you don’t see me on IMs.
Scorpio for this week:
“My God, these folks don’t know how to love,” wrote novelist D. H. Lawrence, “that’s why they love so easily.” He certainly wasn’t referring to people from your tribe. You Scorpios may find it easy to entertain gusts of lust, but you’re too smart about real love to dive casually into its mysteries. You want to be a perpetual student who’s in humble awe of the primal power of deep attraction. You know intimately that no matter how sweet and light love may sometimes feel, it always has the potential to sweep you into the unpredictable depths and change everything forever. Meditate further on these matters; it’ll prepare you for the coming weeks.
Hrm. I’m hoping this just ends up another “Oh, SHIT!” moment. Especially given, that in a couple of weeks I’ll be at my friend Jeremy’s wedding. And we know what happens at those things…
So, due to the fact that I need to get some things back in order (like sleeping), I’m taking time off from the internet. You can catch me on email and I’ll respond, but I won’t be on IMs for a while. Hopefully, I’ll be able to make it out to a few parties, but I have some important fights coming up that I need to train for, and some habits to re-develop.
My thoughts on today’s CNN news:
The president wants Congress to give his administration the power to set the standards for cars, using a system it says cuts emissions while preserving choices and safety for costumers. Bush opposes any legislation simply setting a number for higher fuel-economy standards, an approach Democrats like better. Source
I hope the AP finds better proof-readers in the future. Though, I’m happy that costumers will have plenty of choices, but what about the customers?
Russian President Vladimir Putin on Saturday blamed U.S. policy for inciting other countries to seek nuclear weapons to defend themselves from an “almost uncontained use of military force.”
The stinging attack underscored growing tensions between Washington and Moscow.
“Unilateral, illegitimate actions have not solved a single problem, they have become a hotbed of further conflicts,” Putin said at the Munich Conference on Security Policy, an annual forum attracting senior officials from around the world.
“One state, the United States, has overstepped its national borders in every way.” Source
The previous quote I saw from this, attributed Putin as stating that it was the UNs responsibility to do the things that he’s accusing the US of doing. Which, while true, will never happen as long as the UN is a waste of US soil. I hope the new SG will give that organization its balls back. With that said, I’m also curious, as to how the US, who hasn’t used a Nuke since Japan, is causing other countries to wish to obtain Nukes. For starters, they’re absolutely worthless without a means to deploy them, and the last thing you want to do is deploy them on your own soil. Also, if I’m remembering my “post” Cold War politics, we signed agreements with Russia on the purpose of arms reductions, due to the fact that they had Nukes too, and still do. Added to that, I don’t really think Russia has much of a leg to lecture us on, about international politics. Chechnya anyone? I’d also like to point out this little tid-bit, Putin attacked Bush’s administration for stoking a new arms race by planning to deploy a missile defense system in Eastern Europe and for backing a U.N. plan that would grant virtual independence to Serbia’s breakaway province of Kosovo. Which, I think is probably the lynch-pin of Putin’s whole argument. I’m curious as to how the knowledge that Russia isn’t the only big dog in that area of the world is colouring his view.
Invoking the memory of fellow Illinoisan and the 16th president of the United States, Abraham Lincoln, the first-term senator addressed thousands packed into the Springfield, Illinois, town square on a chilly day in America’s heartland. Source
Glad to see the party who didn’t like his (Lincoln) policies are cool with lining themselves up with him now. With that said, I won’t be voting for him either. We’ll see who the Rep’s can put forward, as to whether I’ll be voting in the Presidential election again.
“I did not evolve from Turkana Boy or anything like it,” says Bishop Boniface Adoyo, head of Kenya’s 35 evangelical denominations, which he claims have 10 million followers. “These sorts of silly views are killing our faith.” Source
Yeah, evolving from another animal is somehow less plausible than the Christian God pointing his finger and blinking it into existence (yes, I’m taking the extreme of the Creationist debate to task, you middle-grounders can find your own way). With that said, I’m curious as to what he thinks he evolved from, besides his birth mum?
have close, meaningful relationships with espresso brownies, cold beer, and reruns of “The West Wing.” Until recently, it hadn’t occurred to me that these paramours are, in fact, three of the major players in my stress-management strategy. Hey, I wasn’t even aware I had a stress-management strat Source
I highly suggest anyone who feels that they are constantly running to become aware of how they destress. Once you recognize it, it becomes more meaningful and useful. It also allows for a change in habits if its needed.
In a letter to employees, Jim Samples, the general manager and executive vice president of the network, wrote: “I deeply regret the negative publicity and expense caused to our company as a result of this campaign. As general manager of Cartoon Network, I feel compelled to step down, effective immediately, in recognition of the gravity of the situation that occurred under my watch.” Source
I’m sorry, but the idiocy in Boston is not the fault of the Veep of CN. In all honesty, I think TBS paying the city back is wrong. If they wanted to be nice, I’d suggest half, not the whole amount. The good thing, I’m not seeing the other cities running to nurse off that teat. Hopefully, they’re just laughing at Boston, too. Sad to know that an elite college is in that town, you would think that would up a few mental numbers, but apparently not.
I’ll leave it at that. 🙂 Save your screen, as I could go on and on.
So I’m a little late…
Scorpio for the week of Feb. 1:
Some people think of me as a pure Californian, marinated in Left Coast politics and raised on New Age memes. But the truth is I spent the first 12 years of my life in the Midwestern heartland, the next six years on the East Coast, then nine years in the South. I’m as mongrel a breed of American as it’s possible to be. Though I may bloom with Californian-style eccentricities, my roots are deep in down-to-earth cultural memes. Now I’d like you to do for yourself what I just did, Scorpio, only more so. Remember in detail your origins. Take inventory of the places that have helped make you who you are. Note wryly the differences between what people imagine you to be and what you know you are.
Let’s see, 1st year was in Oklahoma, second 2 were in Michigan, the following 8 were in Illinois, and the 8 after that were in Texas. The 3 following years were back to Illinois and then I found myself down here, in Atlanta, GA. I like the atmosphere of CenCal, NoCal, and Sardenga, with Sardenga being my favourite. Cis-Alpine Italy was really nice, but not the Meditteranean. Maybe I’ll find a new happy spot in Scandinavia, who knows. I just want to fly.
My horrorscope from Tarot.com, today, was talking about a past conversation, and how I’m at the point that I can evaluate it, and put it away. I can’t say that there’s any particular conversation, however, there is a long string of events. Over my trip to my parents (what I didn’t feel like turning the video camera on for, even though I should have), I kept coming back to my issues with the male figures in my life. Those have always been messed up, somehow. Yes, this is Freudian, but it does stem back to my early relationship with my father. That revelation is quite blaringly obvious. But, my dad and I are on a much better plane right now, and I can put all of the issues that we had, while I was growing up, away. It’s the relationships that followed, that I’m having difficulty with, again. My mind always wanders to two in particular. The abusive one with D, and the fucked-up beyond any usefulness that followed with AOLs beloved “Bard”. Granted, the latter is just an irritating itch, but I’m still trying to figure out why it itches so much. I know I still have a great deal of anger towards D, more to the point, I want to mangle his body beyond all visable recognition. I don’t hate him, I don’t despise him. I just want to guarantee that he’s no longer part of the human race, I guess. I want him completely dead to me. So, I guess that means concocting another ritual, as a means to deal with him and put him further away from me.
But, I will say, the highlight of last week was waltzing with my dad to Lara’s Theme. That made me happy, especially as he let go of his need to control whether or not my steps were right, and just let them come as they may. It was flawless. My other happy point, was getting to talk with my Bitch for a couple of hours. I really miss him right now, but he has promised to be there for me while I spaz for the next couple of months. My Professore told me he believes I have a good change of medaling at Pan-Ams, so I’m going to go for it. Those will be in March, out in Cali. And, he wants me to fight sometime in March or April, MMA. So, I have my mum calling to wake me up every day, my dad has taken up the slack, to make sure I’m out of bed by 8 so I can be at the gym early. I’ll have to actually start weight training again, and working on my stand-up. The down-side, I’m getting sick.
Oh yeah, forgot to mention…I did a Texas Two-Step with a WWII vet, who fought at Battle of the Bulge. 🙂
Well, I have now read The Bridge to Terebithia. Still digesting it, much to the chagrin of my neice, who is determined to play with her Aunt, whose nose is stuck in a book. Oh well.
Scorpio for this week:
Don’t feel bad if you come from a dysfunctional family. Studies done by The Institute for the Study of Universal Addiction indicate that 97 percent of all families are dysfunctional. You should, however, feel bad if you pass up the opportunities you now have to heal the ravages caused by your dysfunctional family. Here’s a good place to start: By trying to dissolve your habit of feeling victimized, damaged, or burdened by the people with whom you shared your original home, you could release yourself from a curse you’ve been casting on yourself–and magically set in motion overdue changes in your other family members.
Heh, I don’t come from a dysfunctional family, but my extended family is the most dysfunctional thing this side of WinME (which, I just found out that my box had no where near enough memory to run ME, and I got the most that Dell would send me). With that said, my parents and I have been having a blast. The other day I went to watch my dad’s music group reherse, and I have video of that up on my myspace page. We had a blast. Today, I went with my mum for a spa day. It was her first massage and pedicure, she enjoyed it. 🙂 Now, to see how my brother is doing.
Freakchylde's 