I am sorely in need of inspiration. I feel drained, dead, and grasping as weak straws to pull myself up out of this hole. Honestly, I feel worse inside than the weather looks right now. I feel the pull to write, but few things emerge from my fingers even though the thoughts in my head are swirling around like a vanilla/chocolate pudding cup.

Direction, currently lacking and focus is about as tame as a golden retriever in a park….Oh shiny! Oh wait! Duck….no, SQUIRREL!!!! Yeah. I know this means transition, and transition is good even though it means slipping and sliding through mud to get to the water to clean it all off.

My parents are helpful, but I still feel like the worthless child who has capacity for greatness then fails miserably at every turn.

I wish the gov’t would hurry up and approve Pastry’s visa. One less thing to be in the back of my mind and haunting me.

I see the world around me, knowing that this is transition, but knowing that it could also go in the way that no one wants to see. Revolution seems to be the word of the day, and while I had hoped it would be at the ballot box, it seems that it will not occur in that location, but in a much worse manner than anyone had thought. It’s going to cause a lot of good people to question themselves and make choices they wish they had never needed to consider. And I hate the fact that I think this way.

Further and further down the rabbit hole…