But I can't bring myself to really say what all is going on with me. I have to force myself to do almost everything. I'd rather sit in bed and watch the birds at the bird feeder than deal with people. Some days are good, some days are bad. Today is a bad day, but I have to bring myself to take care of things – like go to work. The good thing is that my heart is fully open right now, as is everything above it. So that contact with everything more subtle is flooding me. I have missed it, just wish that it hadn't required something this drastic to reconnect with it.