Author: Saille

Who am I? On the surface I'm a nature-loving dirt worshipping hippy in search of a good adrenaline rush. That's all I have for now.

Another year…

So what did I learn? I’ve learned I can be pretty damned independent. I’ve learned I am capable of being more responsible. I’ve learned that I really don’t have to take shit from people who insist on shoveling it in my direction. I’ve also learned, that the sky is really the limit, and I have the ability to touch it and that it’s a pretty vast space. This last year has pretty much been about getting myself together and doing what I need to do, to move forward in this next year. It’s been about transitioning. And while this next year is as well, it’ll be more of a settling, than the actual steps necessary to get to the point. The final stages, if you will. I have the new responsibility for my little sister, and assisting in her finding out who she is to be. And that is my only oathbound responsibility to anyone other than myself.

As for actual hatch-day spoils….Well, my mum sent me a Barnes and Noble gift card, and as I wanted to share the wealth with my Scotsman, I think I’m going to put all of it towards a program for the next language I’m looking at learning. She also sent my Pink Floyd: Pulse and The Wall, as well as Meatloaf’s Greatest Hits. (I blame my brother for snagging the tapes that I could have added to my collection.) My Scotsman took me to a wonderful Italian dinner at Baronda, with a very hot waiter….grrrrrrrrrrrrr….and a night at the Ballet! We went to see Giselle and the Atlanta Ballet did a wonderful production, and now I know why they’re faltering on their funding. The place was far from packed, except maybe the first 4 rows. But their talant is amazing, nonetheless. Alas, as much as I loved noticing how often I was pointing my toes during the performance, the best present was the one I gave myself. The sky. I dove out of a perfectly good airplane, with a wonderful instructor attached to me, who was determined to change my perspective. Little did he know, my perspective was already there, it just needed proof. Can’t say I’m scared of falling anymore, though, I probably still am to an extent. I can’t even begin to describe the amount of joy it gave me, but hopefully my smile can speak for itself. Next stop, the bottom of the ocean. Me’s a happy freak right now. And it started off with a wonderful wish from my Baby. I need to come up with a better nickname for him….prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Scorpio for this week:

“Dear Mr. Sensitive Astrologer: Let’s get one thing straight. I don’t want peace of mind! So stop trying to talk me into going after it! It’s impossible to have it on this earth. Got that? And another thing. I don’t care about your time-consuming emotional resolution stuff! I’m not interested in chasing after the unrealistic goal of being a nice person. I just want pure, raw, naked success–the kind of glory that makes me feel really proud of my powerful effect on people. That’s it! So shape up and start giving me what I want in your little horrorscopes. -Truth-Telling Scorpio.” Dear Truthy: I love to help my readers achieve glory that makes them feel proud of their powerful effect on the world. But in my opinion the best way to accomplish that is by cultivating peace of mind, emotional resolution, and kindness. By the way, it’s now an excellent time to make great progress in this work.

FreeWill Astrology

Does this mean I have to be nice to my ex-boss? I’m fucked. Now, if it involves everyone else, I agree.

Scorpio for this week:

You’re ready for take-off. It’s time to taxi to the launch location and prepare to go airborne. I suggest you do what birds and airplanes do, which is to fly directly into the wind as you leave the ground. As long as you’re forcefully propelling yourself forward, that will give you maximum lift. Oh, and flap your wings gracefully, not frenetically. Don’t stare at the ground right beneath you, but rather fix your gaze on a distant point high above you. Halloween costume suggestion: eagle, jet, hang-glider, dragonfly.

FreeWill Astrology

Hrm. There’s that dragonfly theme again. I really need to get off my ass and look that stuff up. At any rate, the flight has been postponed due to negligent equipment. 😀 We’re currently in the process of fixing it. With that said, it’s getting close to the in-between time, so I’ve been spending time with myself of late. Not really much in the company of others, outside of people catching my on im’s. I’ve been in a cleaning frenzy, and my room is clean, just need to take care of the floors, then work more on the sunroom. My desk is finally dismantled, we just need to call the waste guys to come pick that, and the old stereo that doesn’t work, up. Need to clean the floors in there, least where my desk was, clean-up the shelves and move the printer stuff against the wall so the gamers have more room. Eventually, we’re going to put the tv back there, and I’d like to make the front room the sitting room, vs the entertaining room. I think that will work better when we have parties during the summer.

So, I don’t get Spring cleaning fever, I get Fall cleaning fever. The sunroom is a clusterfuck, but my desk is now gone. Now to figure out what to do with the shit that was on my desk. I need to clean up my room, so I can move some stuff in there. I need some shelves in my room to put things up. Will have to go looking for some, sometime later. Just need to figure out what the hell to do with all that crap. With that said, I still have a 17″ monster monitor if anyone wants it. Otherwise, it goes to the recycling bin.

I wonder what she would have done with hard of hearing students, or deaf students?

UK teacher loses veil discrimination case…

Seriously, this is always my question with stuff like this, how it would relate to me? I’ve had to ask professors to trim their mustaches, to open their mouths more when they spoke, along with using tape recorders and comparing notes with other students. It was annoying. It’s hard enough to have to sit down with everyone else’s notes, to make sure I don’t miss things that cost me a grade (as in one of my classes, and I’m still sure the prof made it up just to give me a C), but to have to sit there, during class, trying to focus on what’s being said, and then having the back of my mind running because I’m not sure what the prof said because the lips aren’t backing up what I’m hearing, and then asking for a repeat and still having the same problem. That woman’s class would have been hell for me. If I couldn’t handle a simple unkempt mustache, how the hell could I handle a veil that blocked every chance of seeing anything she said?

whatizit?!? Well…..been busy. I give thanks to my dear Scotsman for turning on my lights this morning and kicking my ass out of the house to go lift weights. I spoke with one of my grappling partners about working with me on my stand-up and putting the whole thing together, so once I have my schedule set this week, I’ll be able to fit that in. Work has been all out this week. My boss is out sick with pneumonia, so I’m covering for her and so far, that’s meant full schedules again. I hope she heals quick, because I won’t be able to train and do full schedules at the same time.

If I haven’t posted it here, I’ve decided to go sky-diving for my birthday. I keep meaning to call and find out how much the freefall cert is, but I keep forgetting. So that is on slate for Monday, along with making vet appt’s for the terrors. Also need to run by the Goethe Institüt to see when their conversation hours are, or maybe show up for tourist hour so I can at least speak and hear German. When I can speak French better than I can speak German, there’s a problem. Besides, I need to get back into languages, the goal is to learn Finnish and some Danish by this summer, so I won’t get too lost while over there.

Anyway, that’s what’s up with me right now. Hoping that I’ll get some more down time so I can write some more, got tons of stuff in my head and need to pop it out on paper, or something.

Scorpio for this week:

In his book A Whack on the Side of the Head: How You Can Be More Creative, Roger von Oech quotes one of his clients, an architect: “Play is what I do for a living; the work comes in organizing the results of the play.” Make this your guiding principle in the coming weeks, Scorpio. Ask the universe to give you lots of opportunities to mess around and improvise blithely and resurrect your playing-in-the-sandbox consciousness. Come up with good excuses to let your attention wander and explore previously off-limits fun and games. A few weeks from now, you can begin organizing all the good ideas that your frisky experiments will generate between now and then.

FreeWill Astrology

Interesting perspective, definitely one that needs to be played around with! 😀

So, what’s up with the me? Well, I’m still an insomniac, the source is the fact that I’m always running during the day to avoid thinking of fighting, and when I lay down to sleep, I’m going over drills, holes and future bouts in my head. Go me. So, to combat that, my Doc now has me on Relora to decrease the anxiety and orders to start meditation and yoga again. I managed to successfully wake up this morning at 4.30 to hit the bathroom and promptly go back to sleep, instead of eating a snack and heading to the gym as planned. But surprisingly, I’m fully rested. The goal is to get back to shift sleeping, mainly in 3 hour increments. I’m also going to make a solid attempt at getting away from the laptop more often. I should be spending my day off with my teammates and in the park, but I don’t. I go home and sit with my laptop. Yes, I suck. I also need to get better about my chores. I’ll do things in spurts, but never enough to get anything done. And that includes cleaning up my bike for actual use.

I made the mistake of looking at myself in the mirror the other day. I mean actually looking at myself and realized, I’ve gotten so caught up in everything, that I’ve stopped taking care of myself. My face is a mess, my digestive tract is an even bigger mess (mainly the stress and hyper-alertness). So I’m taking a pause in this next week, mainly to actually try and get my schedule set the way I want it, and actually hold to it. It’s gonna suck for everyone else, because I am going into hermit mode, so if you want to see me, please let me know and be flexible, as my schedule is pretty slammed. I feel bad, because I’m almost a month over-due for taking my sister to get her new skateboard, but at least I can afford it and the safety equipment to go with it. I haven’t spent near enough time with my Scotsman, and I keep blowing thegreyman off, along with a few other people – namely WT and moonbird (neither of which I’ve seen in MONTHS).

And yes, my goal is to also make it out to Sunday brunch again. So hopefully I can kick my ass out of bed earlier enough on Sunday after I get back from NC.

Scorpio for this week:

Medical researchers have discovered an innovative technique for fighting brain cancer: radioactive scorpion venom. Injected into tumors, it attacks the malignancy with remarkable efficiency. I mention this, Scorpio, because it’s a good metaphor for an opportunity that’s now presenting itself to you. If invoked and applied in small doses, a normally toxic part of your Scorpio nature can catalyze a breakthrough that will lead to a deep healing.

FreeWill Astrology

Ummmmmmmm. Yeah. Only healing I need, is to come out of this funk. But that’s just because I have too much shit on my table right now.

At any rate, I’m heading to the smorgasbord called Camp LeJeune this weekend for Captress time. Mraowr! With that said, one of my coaches is fighting on the UFC undercard this weekend. Rawk!