Last night’s realization:

I pursue emotionally unavailable men, probably because I am emotionally unavailable for those who are overly emotional. Has something to do with trying to deal with my own emotional baggage. But I perpetuate the circle, and that leaves me feeling completely isolated and unsatisfied.


  1. i do similar.

    women that are available and love me, i keep at a distance.

    the women i love are unavailable for one reason or another.

    then again, some of those in the first group don’t necessarily “fit” with me.

    i don’t see this as something tho fix, it is just the way i am for now.


      1. being inaccessible is a survival trait. i freely admit this for myself. i’m sure it has a lot to do with past rrelationships, but well, for instance:

        one woman i’ve been seeing would be easy to have a relationship with. but there are also some issues in her make-up.

        so i am glad i have that basic keep-em-at-arms-length-emotionally, thing i have.

        i’m not planning on changing that as i see it as a plus.

        i dont trust the concept of good relationships these days.

        there are some people who i would make a real effort to work something out, but again, these women are not available.


      2. Ahhhhh, but that, I don’t do. I do get emotionally attached, I just don’t bring myself to unload the emotional baggage. That ends up being one of the issues, because I don’t open up when I need to, or don’t open up because I don’t feel that I have the space or support to do so.


      3. yeah i’ve done that too.

        i’ve lost a couple of good ones because i hesitated and protected my self too much.

        oh well.

        i really THINK i desire a committed relationship, maybe i just don’t trust the concept. it’s too easy to love a lot of people.


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