I’m not sure why I still feel the need to start crying. It’s starting to get a bit overpowering for me to the point I think I’m going to head over to my Scotsman’s house, crawl into a shower and attempt at letting it all out.

At any rate, ritual was very nice last night. I didn’t get home till 1 AM and I still managed to forget my casarole dish at the priest and priestess’ house. I was asked if I was going to dedicate again, and I am. This group is very much the one for me and last night just proved it for me. I actually participated in a full discussion with both the Bards and my priest in regards to magical workings, historical facts/myths, and several other things. I was proud of myself. I also threw away the last negative thing from my recent path to let all of it go. Felt very nice as well.

Back to today. Work was fairly slow, didn’t bug me much, but I’m still feeling that lost and trapped feeling I’ve had for a while. Things are starting to weigh on me and I’m not sure how much I can handle it. I’ve been told to be patient, things are coming along, but it doesn’t make things easier to carry. I’m still worried, feeling alone, just wishing a few things would be said sooner, rather than later. I hate waiting. I also wish I could not be the first to say ‘I love you’, for once, just once and I’ll be happy.