Ok, my day is officially for shit. Apparently this is the cosmic April Fool’s Day, in regards to me. Everything that could go wrong has (thank the gods I haven’t tried to drive my car), and it’s continuing to go wrong. Seems my ability to communicate has been for shit as well, seeing as though nothing I have said has been understood and nothing I haven’t said has been understood either. I feel an overabundance of negativity around me and I’m hating it to the point I actually cried today. Tried to cry about everything I’ve been feeling the need to lately, but like that happened. So all that still needs an outlet because I couldn’t fucking get that out. I scared the death out of the cats because I decided to attack the couch and use it as a punching bag, while they were on it. Almost threw my laptop out the window, several times. And I’m still hungry. Brunch was hell for me, because I was seriously hungry and for some dumbass reason they couldn’t fulfill my request, after the waitress finally decided to come around. So, me, being me, decided I wasn’t going to waste money there on food. On top of that, my end of the table was filled with leftover trash from the previous people, which never got cleaned up. Seriously, it was the worst service I’ve ever had at that place, and I definitely was not thrilled with it. I’ve managed to kill the lavendar plant I got for dedication, hopefully it’s not too dead and revives. Almost killed the plant I received last night because “it will live in the car, we’ll get it out in the morning.” Well, this morning the leaves were seriously wilted and the soil was completely dry. Good thing I remembered it, because it will not “survive in the car.” Gods, why do I even bother listening to anyone right now? All it’s doing is making things worse at the moment. All I hope for is that my webserver isn’t cleared out, with no back up. Damn, knowing my luck lately, the fact I just wrote that will result in it happening. Fuck.

Alright, so now that I’ve noticed all the surreal things that are happening to my friends, I’m definitely sure that something is afoot. See, this week for me has been quite a backwards week. And in the shower this morning, because all good, deep thinking happens during my showers, I came to the conclusion that this nice gash on my finger was a demanded blood sacrifice from me. I’m not sure what it’s for, but it is one, nonetheless. See, the way I had opened that knife would have caused it to fold shut before it even hit my finger. Yet, it stayed open. Friday was completely off, even ritual for Mean Samraigh, and I mean off. I ran out of gas going to ritual, but as luck – if it really was luck – would have it, I ran out right as I pulled into the turn lane in front of a gas station. So, I rolled my car across the street and some guys helped me get it up the incline to the gas pump (and one of the fuckers stole my “it’s a druid thing” sticker). Then we had ritual, where I noticed I wasn’t the only one off. I know I was grounded at one point, but then I wasn’t and then I was again. Gained some great insight from a grove sister, but the whole time, I still felt “out of it”. Others were a bit off too, but that’s not for me to discuss. Anyway, on the way home my car died on GA400. A guy stopped and helped me call my Scotsman, who then called the police and got a complete runaround. By luck, an officer saw the light in my car on (I decided to sit and read) so he stopped and took me to the local gas station to wait for my Scotsman. Then, my Scotsman took me back to my car, got it started and drove for another 10 mi. or so, and died again….for good. Then we got a tow truck, it is sitting out front with a new gas filter (we’re not ready to try it out yet). And now I’m sleeping till 12 every day. Oh yeah, there was the UPS bullshit earlier in the week, but that has been taken care of and already stated for your viewing pleasure. Project night was great, for being off, we got plenty done and next week gains a long talk afterwards about “just saying ‘no”, honesty, and growing balls (not the kind that reside between two legs – the ones that allow you to stand up for yourself and others). So, off to brunch now.

Interesting…

Scorpio for the week of June 19th:
“I’m at a loss to understand why Juneteenth isn’t one of America’s major holidays. Observed every June 19, it celebrates the emancipation of African-American slaves in the 1860s. Shouldn’t it be a time of rejoicing for every race? When one group of people is held in bondage, the lives of all others are distorted. The same is true about the community of sub-personalities that resides within you. When one aspect of your multifaceted psyche is weak and oppressed, the rest suffer, too — even the supposedly healthy sides of you. I bring this up, Scorpio, because the astrological omens say your own liberation day is nigh. It’s time to free every part of you that is in chains.”

Compliments of FreeWill

Well, turns out the music project is on a much better road than it previously was. I’ve got one song to actually put the vocals to, everything else is in place, and one song to write lyrics for. This rocks, so much. Thank you Sir bedivere for coming to the rescue!

In other news, UPS sucks. Yesterday they didn’t even wait around to get a signature, the day before they didn’t even bother to show up (but said they did), and so far, no new notices today. And I have shit to do today! I can’t sit and wait for the fuckers to show up, but nooooooooooo, that’s what I have to do because the bastards are bastards. But, there is a note on the door that states “It takes more than 2 minutes to get to this door. If there are 2 cars in the driveway, you can wait another minute for me to get to the door. It won’t kill you.” I think that should piss him off.

So, updates for the day….

Seems today is the surrealist’s dream. The highlight of it was the focus on bodily fluids. One of the packages we got from our regular distributer had all the clothes in it wet. However, the box, itself, was dry and so were all the bags that the clothes were separated into. At first, we thought it was water. After wading in it, we realized it smelled very acidic, like urine. After the freakout regarding that, and two hours later, I was trying to pop the register drawer open, and sliced into my finger. So, I now know first hand how much I can bleed all over the place, what my own adipose tissue looks like, and how coherent I can manage to be while going into shock. I even managed to clean up my own blood off the knife, the register, and the counter, and sterilize the surfaces. *grin* Now, my wrist hurts like a bitch, and I’m learning to type without a middle finger.

My apologies to those of the faintest of hearts.

Have I mentioned I feel a bit bad for having retreated into my own little world, housed by the fact I have too much to do with this house? I have left my friends, almost, in the dust, by the fact this house takes up too much of my time, or that my job manages to get in the way of the only free-time I might have had with those I’m close to? I suck.

I suck. Despite having numerous reminders, I never got the chance to call my dad. So, I had to suffice with a last minute email and a promise to call tomorrow after I get off work. Hopefully I’ll remember my cell phone tomorrow to do that. I really suck, though, given we’re both known to forget the other’s b-day and how old the other one is….I believe it will be forgiven.

Ok, I’m definitely an athlete. I got some new shoes today, and before I went for my first run in them, I sat and smelled them. I’m odd, there’s nothing like the scent of new athletic shoes. I guess you could equate it to new car smell, but I don’t like new car smell. I like new shoes smell, as well as old gym smell. I’ve spent waaaaaaaaaaay too much time in the gym. Good gods.