Month: July 2003

Ya know, when I was there, this was my biggest complaint about going to the main churches around the center of the cities I visited. My other complaint was the level of disrespect I viewed from other tourists, especially while in St Peter’s Basilica. While there, it was posted and stated several times before entering that everyone was to remain quiet. It hit the point, while I was there, when the Swiss Guards ended up getting on the intercom and actually raising their voices for silence. I was ready to start beating the German students there (yes, it’s actually quite easy to determine who all is being the loudest by which language they’re speaking) for being disrespectful. The worst part, I’m an American pagan, you know, those rude, anti-christian people who have so much backlash for the religion. And there’s a reason why I found no spirit in those places, the spirit was too quiet to be heard over that ruckus. Gods, to have sat for hours in St. Paul’s, that would have been wonderful (it’s not a tourist spot, even though it’s on a tour – meaning one group of people every 2-3 hours and a huge gate to keep everyone else out).

Fucking stupid tourists

I just came back from a 45 minute walk. It was amazing to just sit, relax, and feel the muscles in my quads start twitching, as well as my TFL/IT band. I’m contemplating whether or not I can afford a limited gym membership. My therapist, at one point, suggested that I add some weight training to my yoga/walking regimen to strengthen my hip/leg muscles. I think I’m doing ok with what I’m doing. So far, I’ve almost gotten my ankle realigned so that I can walk flat on my feet instead of to one side or the other. That’s assisting my knees to slowly turn away from each other so they’re facing forward, instead of being a bit knock-kneed. But that is done mainly through my stretching and being overly conscious of which direction my feet and knees are facing during yoga. I’m hoping that things start to work their way higher up. My neck has been a serious pain in the last few months, mainly due to my chest muscles being overly contracted. I’ve been stretching out my shoulders pretty good, and it’s starting to help. However, I really need to go in and have the scar tissue ripped open in my rotator cuff so I can have a more free movement there. At the moment, to properly stretch, I find that I’m dislocating my shoulder to get into position. Not very helpful. But, my shoulders are slowly moving back into their natural position, which is relieving some of my upper back pain. Now to just reset my pelvis to get rid of the lower back pain. 😛

I was cleaning my bathroom the other day, and came across a letter, written early in my relationship with Big Cat. I knew I still had the letter, afterall, I spent months carrying it around in my pocket. It wasn’t, so much, a letter professing love, so much as it was a letter professing the connection we had/have. The place I chose to place it after moving in with my Scotsman was what was interesting. My workroom and office have plenty of reminders to me, of what I am and what I’m looking to become. However, it’s my bathroom, where I keep most of the stuff that lies closest to my heart. Below my mirror is the Universal Druid’s Prayer as well as a poem called I am Me. I keep those there because they are primary reminders of what I need to keep at my core and I can read them every day. I can see why I chose to keep Big Cat’s letter there, because it is a reminder, that at my core, I do have a necessary connection that hasn’t been severed. Even through the distance and through our decision to save our friendship, while sacrificing our relationship.

I know for some of the people I know, this might be an ill-timed topic, with all the postings I see on my friends page. But know this, even though we can feel utterly alone, at times, we can’t say we truly are alone when it’s only the result of not seeing where our resources are really located. Strength comes from within, and support can come from without. Look, and you will find both.

*hugs* to all my friends who are passing through a time of difficulty. I am here for you, whenever you need me. Even if it’s just to bitch at someone.

Scorpio for July 24th:

” “Sometimes an orgasm is better than being onstage,” says Mick Jagger. “Sometimes being onstage is better than an orgasm.” I’m betting there’ll be no need to choose between these two forms of satisfaction in the coming weeks, Scorpio. They should both be readily available and supremely pleasurable. Your version of being “onstage” won’t be like Jagger’s, of course. But it should afford you an equally fine chance to show off your animal magnetism and imprint receptive minds with your bright ideas.”

Compliments of FreeWill Astrology

I can recall an ancient time, when the land whispered its name along the wind. When hero’s walked the roads, and prophecies fortold, which brought down kings and warriors alike. But all that is left now, is a tower, standing alone, onTor-more as a distant reminder of Ethnea, the mother of Lugh. As Ethnea was a child, her father, Balor, was given a prophecy that a child by her would bring about his death. When he heard this, he imprisoned her with 12 maidens, who he charged with not allowing her to see the face of a man, in a tower on the coast of his kingdom. In time, a man appeared at the door, in the guise of a woman, ushered in under the pretext of having been saved by a Druid, from the tyrant who had kidnaped her. This man was Cian, son of DianCecht, and was there to seek revenge on Balor for the theft of his Sacred milking cow. Shortly after arriving, Ethnea caught a glimpse of Cian and was fast in love with him. To assist the young lovers, the Druid cast a sleeping spell over the maidens to prevent them from interfering in Ethnea’s courtship……

Alright, for those of you curious, the Grove Bard has reminded me of the Bardic competition this year. I’ve been thinking of what I wanted to do, and one thought is a tale, the other is a song. Well, unless I feel like singing a’capella, or to a violin played like a mandolin, that won’t happen…so, during this week, you’ll all be stuck with my attempts at short story creation for this. *grin*

I can recall an ancient time, when the land whispered its name along the wind. Times were much different then, before the conquerers came and everything changed. Then the age of the Hero passed into history, and then into legend.

Just so you all know, I have no clue where this story will go, but now the journey starts.

So this is where I’ve been failing lately…

“If you’re a songwriter, it’s a good time to make yourself a Jennifer Lopez sock puppet, install it on your left hand, and ask it to help you create a tune that will sell a million copies. If you’re a painter, it’s a perfect moment to channel the spirit of Pablo Picasso as you dash off a few dozen masterworks, and if you’re a writer, you should pretend you’re the reincarnation of F. Scott Fitzgerald and whip out a future bestseller. In short, Scorpio, I recommend that you imitate people who have been successful in the way that you want to be. If necessary, get a new hero who inspires you to even greater heights than your old familiar heroes.”

Compliments of FreeWill

Otherwise, I see a valley before me.

Sometimes, I feel like I’m losing control. Feeling it slip away from me like it’s being pulled, quickly, out of my hands. My tiring grasp, making a last ditch effort to hold tight, that, which is mine. However, its inevitable failure looming on the horizon of my thoughts. Locked away, is where I’m going, behind the wall of myself. It’s the only safety I have, and the only one I can afford myself. Trust is nowhere but me, silence, my only option.

Now that I’ve seen the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, I sit in amusement in having watched the types of people who walked out of that theatre and wonder how many of them know the stories behind each character. Better yet, how many of them actually know that they are characters from other Literary novels. *scratches head and smiles in amusement*